I should have know better. I only had one item to get, I knew it was close to the cash register and I would get out of there relatively unscathed.
Effing Walmart!
I wasn’t going to fight rush hour traffic just to go to the real-people store, I just needed a case of Diet Coke.
I walked in and was immediately hit with the familiar smell of dirt, BO and fat. I was 10 seconds in and had my Coke and was in line. I checked my 6 for carnies and the ambulatory half-dead that inhabit this place, nada. I was out in less than 3 minutes.
I walked to the far corner of the parking lot where I always park, this gives me 3 clear egress points where I have no traffic to impede my quick get away.
I see a car has parked next to me. Was it a nice car parked there so it remained unmolested by the meth-addled denizens of this low priced nether world? No, it was a ford POS with the widows rolled up and dog tied to the wheel.
It is a very warm 97 degrees out today, not bad for a dog laying in the shade but in a car with the windows rolled up it,s about 120 degrees. The dog is panting and howling as it scrapes the widows. There is no one coming soon and judging by the fact that car wasn’t here 4 minutes ago and now is, I thought the owner might be in Walmart for a while.
There is shade in the spot directly in front of the car and I look inside the car to see if its a stick. I could pop it neutral and push it to the shade, no such luck. I get in my car, throw it in reverses and pull up to the rear bumper of the POS. I give it a little gas, no good, I drop the Road Warrior (really a 2000 Toyota Camry) into 2nd and punch it while playing the theme song from Cops in my head. I hit reverse again and the swing into the space next to the car. The tire marks that are left are heavy and black, and dare I say, totally boss!
I pull out my Mag light as I exit my car and smash his left rear window, the dog jumps a bit but is other wise happy about the fresh air. I walk around to the right side and, after a few hits, take care of the driver’s widow. The odd thing here is that I didn’t break the window I just hit it a few times and it dropped into the door well. I gave the dog some water that I had, filled up the cup holders and then took the 64 oz soda I had with me and dumped it in the passenger seat. The liquid soaked through and the dog ate the ice.
The dog was now in the shade with proper ventilation and I had to run.
Sir, I am sorry that you will have to replace the widows but judging by the $2000 rims and wheels that you have on a $800 car you might want to consider a new car instead.
Besides your whole tail light assembly is smashed all to hell.
Great story! I can never understand why some people are so cruel to animals. Usually even people that hate other people like the innocence of some creature that is big hearted enough to think you deserve to have him sleep with you on the bed. I am glad you did that DOGGY DEFENDER!!!
You are my HERO!
Hey you’re a frigging legend.
Breaks my heart to see a dog mistreated.
I would of hung around and kicked the shit out of the a-hole.
I really want to think you actually did this, because then the Bruce Willis fantasy for me will be complete.
My mother and I were out shopping a couple of months ago and called the cops on some jackasses who had left their pup in their truck with the windows up in the sun on a hot day.
Yay, go you.
Assholes who leave their children/pets in vehicles during any type of dangerous weather deserve the mauling they get. I hope they werent going in for a pack of gum and running back out. Lol. Great story. JUSTICE!!!!!!!!
Haha, great story!
IT WAS YOU!!!!
i would done the same thing except why did you put the soda on the passenger side
I placed the ice there so that the dog could eat the ice but not have to sit in it
haha thats hilarious i would have loved to be there and see that… funtimes!
you is a rasist. you be all breakin’ peopul stuf like you all that and shit. What peopul doi wif they dog is they bizniss not chos. you best not be brakin’ my shit. i fuck you up you break my shit you cracker motherfucker.
Mom?
You are my hero. Fo shizzle!
Boofus. 1, you’re a double racist. I read this over and there were absolutely no racial markers, so why are you assuming the dog abuser was of a particular race, or that Chris was being racist? Also, you called him a cracker. You moron.
2, you TYPED that in ebonics. I have to say- I’m sincerely impressed. I’m not even joking. That takes some thought.
Chris, you are my hero. I’m a massage therapist- if you’re ever in Nebraska, write me and I will give you a free massage!
Is a Nebraska massage slang for something else?
I don’t even know you and I love you already! First because you kick ass for saving a helpless dog. Second because of your comment to the dumbass comment about you cracker motherfucker… “Mom?” Hilarious!!! Keep up the good citizen deeds and hopefully other people will follow!!
I really DO <3 you!
Aww, that’s what the restraining order says as well.
You could have called the cops, however, this was a desperate situation, and they would have done the same thing.
You were right in what you did. Thank you. You are a true hero.
egress…
You have got to be kidding!…
First, best story ever. Second, I hope it’s true. Lastly, I think boofus was comedy.
Ty and that did happen
I wouldn’t consider what you did the right thing, but at least you did SOMETHING. Lots of people wouldn’t bother. If you had no clue how long the dog had been there, in the sun, I’d say you should have yelled in walmart and asked who’s car it is (unless the dog looks dying), and given no response, do what you did. The thing is, you said it wasn’t there for even 4 minutes, so it was probably just a little warm at that point and not dangerously hot, so you could have done the legal thing and called the cops (and not tell them it had only been 4 minutes).
TiSi,
I had and idea of how long as the car wasnt there when I went in, and Im not going to track the ass hat down. I could call the cops but they would get all the smashing joy.
I’m so full of kudos to hand over to you, I don’t know what to do with myself. Chris, I bow and salute you at the same time. (It looks stupid, but my heart’s in the right place.)
THANK YOU.
SRSLY.
Thank you.
You did the right thing.
Thank you.
wow that is just awesome, however you should have then found the nearest pay phone so you could call the police, I hate to see what those people did when they got back to their car and see their windows smashed out because of their dog (even though it wasn’t really it’s fault)
I try not to call the cops after committing a crime.
If this isn’t a made up story then I think you should have taken the dog as well. It seems that the idgits that left it there will probably repeat the performance again one day.
If this story is real, I’m not so sure I’d be applauding you. I take my dog everywhere when I run errands. I have a remote-starter on the car, so the car stays running (keys out) and AC on. Trouble is the car is small and extremely quiet, so even sometimes I’m fooled into thinking it’s not running. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had a do-gooder scowl at me or lecture me when they see the dog. Hello… the A/C is on and it’s cooler in the car than in the store. My point: all dogs in cars are not necessarily evil.
You’ve also effectively turned a dog LOOSE in a walmart parking lot and walked away. He’ll definitely stop panting when he gets run over by one of the idiot drivers. Now dog owner thinks dog was stolen, “learns” nothing.
Next time call the police. They (1) don’t necessarily smash the window in order to open the door and (2) won’t let Doggy loose and walk away in a crowded lot. And if the owners did indeed do something wrong, it’ll hold them accountable.
well tbh he did mention already that ‘he’ wanted the smashing joy lol and i dont blame you nice work on the shunting of the car tho most people just do thw window in and leave it at that but u went the whole 9 yards or well 9 foot maybe
9 feet is my limit, at 10 feet my apathy kicks in.
@ Cal, the dog was tied to the steering wheel
Chris, you rock. Plain and simple. I trained my dog to stay in the car, so she sits there on her throne in the back seat, all four windows open, she is totally comfortable, and at 80Lbs of big black dog, she’s my security system, too.
Calico clearly has reading comprehension problems and a superiority complex. Comment blindly without checking the facts… excellent work…
I like dogs, I hate stupid ppl and I love to smash things.
It was a good day.
I’m thinking you must have a lot of adoring women commenting on this blog.
You make me laugh, and you are eloquent. AND you rescue distressed animals in hot cars.
yup, you’re hot
TY for the kind words, I make up for the hotness by being lazy and generally antisocial.
Heidi, I looked up your IP and Salt Lake is one of my fav towns, so yes you may be my girlfriend.
why, thank you *blush*
GOOD FOR YOU!
Animal lover talking here! That was awsome! You are my hero. If it were me I would have taken the license plates number and the dog and left a sticky note on their windshield informing them that their dog was at the shelter and they were going to get a court notice for animal cruelty. I hate people like that.
You’ve inspired me – I used to just call the police but next time I may just take matters into my own hands like you – you absolutely rock!
Personally, I’d like to see them write an “eye for an eye” law so the abusers get done to them what they do to their animals – only fitting.
You’re a moron. I’m sorry, but you are in this instance. A dog whining inside a car IS NOT AN INDICATOR OF ABUSE. It’s not an indicator of anything in particular, because dogs whine over being left alone every single day, no matter how well they’re treated. How did you know this dog wasn’t whining because it’s owner/friend left him alone? That’s not mistreating an animal. But you assumed it was dying of thirst and broke someone’s window, quite possibly starving this dog because this person is now going to need to replace a window in what is likely his only mode of transportation. And don’t tell me “Oh he was obviously thirsty because he ate the ice”. No, have you ever actually dealt with dogs? I could drop a bucket of ice in front of my dog and he’d go nuts over it, and believe me, he’s not in want for anything.
People like you make me lose respect for people as a whole, because you’re turning up EVERYWHERE. I wish I could fix this guy’s window for him. If he’s driving a pos, it’s probably because it’s all he can afford. Don’t judge a book by it’s cover. Remember that one? Yeah a car is someone’s cover. My bf’s first car was a pos too with nice wheels and a lowering kit – it’s all he could afford first and then once he could afford more he played around with it.
Anyways, in summation – you’re a pretentious prick.
tl;dr
It kills me when I see dogs in peoples cars.. What I can’t understand is why can’t you leave your dog at home if you need to run your errands?? A couple of summers back there was a story on the news where a cop had his dogs because he left it in the car.. the crazy thing here is that the car and the A/C were on. So regardless of what some people think that doesn’t always mean that your dog is safe. Take you dog home first. So what if you have to back track are people really that lazy?
Chris you are a doggy savior and I don’t care what anyone says!
Love your blog!
*The cop had lost his dog*
excuse me
This is my favorite one.
TWSS
Why’d you smash (or whatever) the second window?
Symmetry
I never thought I would say this to another human being, but you are more awesome than Darth Vadar. True, Darth would have crushed this asshat’s larynx from the parking lot (just because he is in tune with the dark side does not mean he doesn’t love dogs) and that would have been way more awesome, but very cool nevertheless.
Cheers!
Sarah
Ty for your kind words but I dont want you to mistake my love of dogs with my love of smashing things.
It was about 50/50.
@Pissed. Go lock yourself in your car, windows up for 5 minutes in 95+ degree weather in full sunlight. And tell me you like it.
Douche. You must be a cat person.