I didnt want to say anything to him but I feel that I need to tell someone the reasons that I believe this to be true.

He makes noises like “Arrr” “Garr’ and I think he said “Avast” once.

He has one eye closed all of the time and his fur looks like a patch over that eye.

He kinda wobbles as he walks, almost like he has a wooden leg. I have not confirmed this though.

He is always digging as to find/bury treasure.

He seems interested in peoples booties. » Read the rest of this entry «

Sorry dude but when you wear pants like that you are inviting this kind of behavior.

I was at the mall the other day to buy some shoes at Macy’s. They were having a sale on Doc Martins and I have never found a better shoe that theirs. As I was checking out I saw a buddy of mine and we decided to head over to the food court for lunch. As we sat down I notice the table next to us was filled with 20 somethings wearing the usual stupid garb of the day, phat pants. You know what I mean, the pants that are 5 sizes to big, barely held up and 5 inches of boxers showing.

This kid turned his chair backwards and straddled it with his back towards us. There was a gap between were your pants stopped and your boxers took over, a kind of cloth backboard. I leaned over and asked my buddy if he had any change and pointed to you. » Read the rest of this entry «